Me Again

Oh man. I haven't posted in such a long time. My life has just been so disorganized and up in the air. So much has happened that I can hardly even get my thoughts in order. And this is particularly difficult for me being a perfectionist.
I've been trying to develop some sort of online business for myself for the pass few years. But it seems that when I have my plan down and am ready to get going something happens to put me off track from my Internet endeavors into something I had no plan for at all. A little over six years ago I started trying to build my own web presence but had a set back when I had found I had breast cancer. So I took time to do what I had to do to get through that situation. Then just when I thought I was ready to get myself together and move forward with my Internet Entrepreneur idea, my youngest son was injured in a work related accident. Which has had surgery after surgery over the pass three and a half years. Now as his physical therapy is winding down to a close and I was ever so ready to do my thing something else has raisin to try to distract me from my goal. But I refuse to let this interfere this time. I have so many ideas and I know that I can profit from them given the proper time and effort.
What is this new thing that is planning on trying to still my time from me? Cancer. Yes, my breast cancer has returned. I just happen to be one of those few rare people who even though I took extensive steps above and beyond what I needed or was required to do to prevent the cancer from coming back have a recurrence. I'm not ready for this nor do I want to go through this; but what choice(s) do I have? Anyway I'm going to try to use my down time (chemotherapy and radiation means many days spent at the hospital or at home) when I'm not feeling to ill, to devote to working on my web world. I have purchased myself a voice recorder, digital camera, camcorder, and a few other gadgets so I can try and work on my web sites when ever, where ever I can.
I may do a lot of venting here about my cancer and my treatment. But the main focus of this blog is to somehow keep me centered. I'm not sure how far progressed my cancer is. I'm still doing testing. I don't feel to ill. Just fatigue easily. But I keep telling everyone I'm not dying. I'm just sick. I just have a chronic illness that will have to be closely monitored and maintained for the rest of my life. And I have no plans of leaving this planet anyways soon.

I Hate Crabs

I hate crabs. No not the steamed variety. I love Steamed Crabs. Mmmmmmmmm yumm. Or not the parasitic insect kind that you refered to as crab lice, also called body lice. Wouldn't want to ever have them. Ok so what other type of crabs are there? While there are many kinds of crabs I am going to speak on one very special variety. People.
People? Crabs? Can't see the connection? Well I call people crabs who don't want to see you advance, move forward, become sucessful. Why do I call them crabs? Well if you have ever been crabbing than you may understand. For those of you who have never been crabbing let me expound a little. After you catch the crabs you place them in a bucket. Now if you look into this bucket you will see the crabs "fighting" to get out. They are climbing all over each other. When one gets to the top and sees that he maybe able to escape this imprisonment. Another crab will grab onto him and pull him back down into the bucket.
So it is with people and life. There are people who just can't stand to see someone be more successful than they are. Anytime they think you may be on your way to obtaining your goals and aspirations these people will try with all their might to interfere somehow. These are the people who don't want to, know how to, or have the vision to be more or do more than what they sre currently doing. Nor do they want you or anyone else to do or be more than you currently are. So everytime you reach that summit in your plan, these people will see fit to find a way to try and destroy or alter your path. They want to pull you back down to where they are. I don't know why these people are like this or what reasons they have for not wanting others to move forward in life. Maybe these people have no goals or asprirations of their own. Maybe they are afraid that once you become sucessful you will forget about them (Well, yes, some of them I will love to forget ever exsisted.). Or maybe they are afraid of change.
You have to be aware of crabs. See them for what they are. Don't let these people keep pulling you back down into the bucket. When you you get close enough to the lip of the bucket. Quick latch on and haul yourself out of the bucket. Now you're back on the ground. But this is not the place to stop. Continue on with your plan. You still must get to the water. Beware of other obstacles in your way. But now you can take a short breather. You are out of the bucket. You have left the crabs behind. Beware! Crabs are everywhere.